Marriage: What is it? And why

It has been on my mind to create this post for a long time but I have had a hard time finding the time to sit down and think through what I wanted to say. Marriage has been in the news a lot lately and it seems to me that the media and the government want to allow only their definition and call anyone who disagrees a hater or bigoted or worse. I am Catholic so it seems to me that the government is focusing on trying to force the Catholic Church to go along with  the current culture, which it never has in all its years.

And yet, even in the Catholic Church, there are many who want to say that it is our job to be inclusive and the surely Jesus would not have excluded anyone. They are not remembering that he called the Pharisees and Sadducees “You brood of vipers, how are you to escape being sentenced to hell?” so he clearly didn't include everyone no matter what they were doing.  Inclusiveness is tantamount to saying that God has no standards and that His holiness can tolerate everyone being welcomed in Heaven. I think it is pretty clear that God does not do that. He says instead, “Be holy as I AM holy.” I heard Mother Angelica at EWTN say that inclusive language is satanic. It seemed an extreme statement but when she explained that it is Satan who wants to separate us from the relationship of father and child that we have with God, I can see her point. If God is feminine or “it” and not masculine, then there can be no familial relationship which is the foundation of Christianity.

When it comes to marriage, God created man and woman in His own image, and said that when they marry, they become one. I do not believe that two men or two women can become one. Neither can they create new life which is one of the essential parts of marriage. My children are adopted so I understand about getting children that way. But with marriage being the foundation of society that it is, marriage can not strengthen society without producing new children. And it has been proven that a solid, healthy family is a family that stays intact, and has a mother and a father for the children. Divorce is the bane of our existence, which is why the Church bans it. The sad reality is that people marry for the wrong reasons and that leads to faulty marriages which were never valid to begin with or which are not strong enough to stand the testing that every family goes through.

Our society, beginning in the 60s with the introduction of contraception, has separated sex from marriage which has not been good for people or for marriage. Men and women are indulging in casual sex and undermining the best chance for a strong marriage by living together first and likely having children first too. The “hook-up” culture demeans the person and makes the frequently resulting baby seem like a mistake. Contraception (which is birth control not birth prevention) says “I do not want babies” and it is a very short step indeed to abortion, which says, “I do not want this baby.” 1.5 million babies are aborted every year in the US and there are twice as many abortions among blacks as among whites.

It takes 2.1 births per couple to maintain the current population but very few countries are maintaining that birth rate due to the high abortion rates and the poor economy. In 2011 the United States dropped to its lowest level ever, below the replacement rate. If it drops to 1.2 the country is in serious decline and no country thus far has recovered from a birthrate of that level. Japan is currently in that place. For comparison, back in the 1950s the birthrate was 5 children per family. The society that figures out how to restore the economic foundation of the family to society will own the future. Right now the Obama administration is working hard to destroy the economic foundation of the family unit so it seems unlikely that the United State will own the future unless things change drastically.

Neither society or the economy can thrive if the family is not strong. And if marriage is not the foundation of society, then the society is crumbling. With the current attack on marriage in the United State, and around the world, it is the very foundations of society that are under attack and society is foundering. Defining marriage as one man and one woman is essential to maintaining the foundations of society.